My old man was 80 yesterday. Eighty. EIGHTY. In an obscure phone call he muttered about how surprised he was to reach such an age, despite his love for hard liquor and cigarettes. Not as surprised as we all are, squire.
The upshot of this milestone, is that rather than accept a ticket to the soulless Emirates stadium, I shall be eating oysters at some plush gaff in Covent Garden. Thanks a fucking lot, Dad.
A 'hinge'? Yuk
It'll no doubt make for an interesting afternoon.
"How's your oysters, son?"
"Not bad, Dad"
"You seem a bit distant, you alright?"
"Yeah, I'm alright"
"The Arsenal playing, are they?"
"Yeah"
"Think they'll win?"
"Should do, doing alright at the moment"
"Shouldn't you be there?"
"YES I FUCKING SHOULD BE THERE. NOT HERE EATING FUCKING THINGS THAT DON'T TASTE OF ANYTHING EXCEPT THE SHIT THAT'S PUT ON THEM AND JUST SLIDE DOWN YOUR FUCKING NECK."
"Oh. Right.
"Four one. Shouldn't be a problem."
Or something like that.
Soooo. The Emirates. I'll hold my hands up. I've been there about three or four times. Highbury? Hundreds and hundreds. I live up in the North West now, slap bang in the middle of nowhere, and when I say middle, I mean middle, and when I say nowhere, I mean nowhere. So I get to a lot of away games. And I love it. I love the away fans, I love the banter, I love them throwing beer on themselves jumping up and down and I love seeing the same faces. But more than this, I love the atmosphere that they create.
Atmosphere. Hmm. Went to watch us capitulate against that lot up the road a couple of months back. Now pardon me if you think I'm wrong/deaf or both, but I thought the atmosphere was awful, just awful. A North London Derby? Do me a favour. At Highbury, two up we'd have gone mental. When they pulled a goal back, we'd have gone double mental. Not at the Emirates. No, at two one people just started moaning and slagging off the players. That'll do it. That'll help. And bugger me if you just knew what was going to follow.
So what is it with The Emirates? Is it too many new(ish) season ticket holders just expecting instant success, is it the exorbitant prices that people are paying and therefore demanding success? Is the cost of watching compounded by watching average players like Denilson and Eboue (I could go on)? Or has football changed so much in the mind of the supporter that it is now 'win at all costs', because it cost so fucking much to go that you should expect anything less?
Me? Meet up with your mates. A couple of pints before, during and after. Shit hot dogs. A fiver on the turnstiles. Standing. Swaying. Shitting myself as the ICF took the North Bank. That's football.
Rose-tinted it may be, but that's how I liked it. It was a day/night out, and football was just part of the experience. I'll stick to the away games. That'll do me.
"Another oyster, son?"
"Why not, Dad. Happy Birthday."
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