Back late from a weekend away in The Lake District with Simon Amstell Hair. We've had a wonderful time full of mountains, lakes, good food, bad food, alpacas, punk sheep, coffee shops, underground shops, a cinema and a bad case of the shits.
SAH received a necklace with a heart on it. She was very happy.
In our absence, it seems as if the whole of the footballing world has been collectively masturbating over Shreks goal on Saturday. Yes, it was a great finish from a shit cross turned into a good cross via a deflection following some woeful build-up play. I'm guessing the fact that it was him, and him being an English him, and the bizarre obsession the press have with all things him, Man Utd and Lord Fucking Ferguson, would explain page after page devoted to it in a sickening hacks wank-fest. For me, it's a brilliant goal. No more. No less. However, I'll take Van Persie's against Charlton any day.
And so the fuck should you. Listen, he's been shit all season, so it was only a matter of time before he did something right. Let's say no more about it.
We beat Wolves 2-0 at The Emirates, two quality Van Persie strikes (see above, he can do stuff) wrapping it up, to keep us in touch with this seasons Premier League winners Man Utd. If it wasn't for Wayne Hennessey, and the usual dodgy finish or two, the score would at least have been four or five. A stroll in the park it seems before the business of The Champions League starts up again for us this Wednesday against our charming friends from Barcelona, and not a new injury in sight.
The mighty barca were held to a draw at Sporting HEEhon. They were tired, apparently. So tired, they were excused training yesterday. Let's hope they stay tired. Pep Guardiola bemoaned the fact that HEEhon suffocated Xavi and Iniesta in midfield. Hard luck, mate. What do you expect them to do? I remember Trevor Francis saying a similar thing after the FA Cup Final replay in 1993 about Chris Waddle.
'What shall we do about Waddle, gaffer?'
'Aah, nothing, don't worry about him, just let him play.'
'But he's brilliant, boss, their best player.'
'Doesn't matter. Let him get on with it. Let's not ruin it for the viewers.'
Wouldn't happen would it? No. Didn't think so. So there's the trick, boys, close them down in midfield, stifle them, don't let them play their football. If HEEhon can do it, I don't see why we can't.
More on Wednesday for the preview. Until then, I shall remain nervous.
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